Just a Bit Wicked (Straight Guys, #7)

by Alessandra Hazard

Vlad was aware it was irrational to dislike a whole nation because of one person, but after the Luke Whitford fiasco, he’d developed a strong aversion to anything English. He wondered if it was some cosmic joke that an Englishman had ruined his professional life and another Englishman had now ruined his personal one.

There was a new family in the village, something almost unheard of. The newcomers had moved from Moscow and they had a teenage boy several years older than Vlad. The boy’s name was Philip and he was unlike any other boy Vlad had seen in his life: soft-skinned, doe-eyed, and pretty useless at farming; or at anything, for that matter. And yet, Vlad couldn’t quite bring himself to despise him. The boy was nice. He had a nice smile and a lot of funny stories to tell. Vlad liked watching him. That was how one day he caught Philip kissing Sergei, another boy from their village. Vlad was utterly flabbergasted. Having lived in a very sheltered, old-fashioned village all his life, Vlad hadn’t even known boys could kiss boys. Confused, he went to his uncle and asked him about it. The fallout was nothing short of explosive. Vlad got the whipping of his life for asking “such a stupid, freaky question.” Philip and his family hastily left the village the same night. Sergei, the boy Philip had kissed, was beaten to death by his own father.

“I’m not a homo. I don’t have any ‘repressed gay feelings.’ It’s pathetic how you gay people see gayness everywhere.”

“You aren’t actually expecting me to feed you, right?” His tone was so incredulous and annoyed that Vlad almost laughed. “I am,” he said, keeping a straight face. He couldn’t deny he enjoyed getting this guy riled up. “I’m a big man, and I burned a lot of calories saving your fat ass last night.” “Excuse me?” Sebastian spluttered. “My ass isn’t—” He stopped and smiled sweetly. “Why, I didn’t know you noticed my ass, Vlad. Careful, or people might get the wrong idea, mate.” Vlad gritted his teeth. “It’s in front of me and it’s huge. Hard to miss, mate.”

“Just words,” Sebastian repeated flatly, his expression darkening. His voice was very soft as he continued. “You know, when I was seventeen, there was a boy living down the street from us. He was my first kiss, my first boyfriend. When some dumb jocks like you found out about us, they called us faggots, disgusting poofs, freaks, told us that we were going to hell and so on—just words, you know.” Vlad leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “So?” “He killed himself,” Sebastian said hoarsely, holding his gaze. “Because of bullies like you who don’t think before opening their mouths. Words can have a lot of power and do a lot of damage.”

Vlad’s family was as homophobic as they get. So be careful with him, okay? I think he’s actually gay, but I doubt he’ll ever admit it. The more he wants you, the more he’ll hate you and blame you for that.”

Vlad stared at the guy. The thing was, Fletcher wasn’t calling Sebastian anything Vlad hadn’t called him, but hearing it from this man...he didn’t fucking like it. Only I can do it. I. Shoving the ridiculous thought away, Vlad said coldly, “Is there a reason you’re telling this story to a total stranger?” Fletcher’s laugh cut off at his tone. For the first time, he looked a little uncertain. “Well, he’s a celebrity these days. It’s not like everyone doesn’t already know he’s a poof, right? Just setting some facts straight here. He was a nobody everyone laughed at back then.” He patted Vlad on the shoulder like they were best bros. “And hey, you’re Russian, you must get it. I wish we had laws against faggots like you do in Russia. If we did, people like him wouldn’t be all high and mighty now.” Vlad stared at that bitter, pathetic man, and thought: Am I just like him?

“He hates me, Mum,” Sebastian said with a snort. “Don’t be silly, Sebastian,” Melinda said. “How can anyone hate you?” “He does,” Sebastian said. Melinda was frowning deeply, looking from Sebastian to Vlad. “Surely my son is mistaken? You can’t possibly hate him.” Vlad shrugged. “I don’t want him dead.” “Well, that’s a relief,” Julia said, not without sarcasm. Vlad was frowning. “I don’t ‘hate’ him. Hate is the wrong word. But he’s a pretentious little shit, too idealistic for his own good.” Melinda opened and closed her mouth. Julia started snickering. “I like you,” she told Vlad. Sebastian kicked her under the table and looked at Vlad exasperatedly. “You could’ve refrained from insulting me at least while you’re in my mother’s house.” But he was a little bewildered. Vlad didn’t hate him? The day was getting stranger and stranger. “Don’t see any point in lying,” Vlad said, his eyes fixing on Sebastian with an intensity that was a little unnerving. “If you weren’t against violence, you could have learned to protect yourself. You’re not a wimp.”

“You look awful,” Julia said, sweeping her gaze over him. “Thanks,” Sebastian said. “That’s just what your baby brother needed to hear after such a traumatizing day.” She rolled her eyes. “Please. You’re tougher than all of us put together. Also, your worst is still better than my best. I’m not the pretty one in the family.” She pulled him into a one-armed hug and kissed him on the cheek. “I’m glad you’re okay, dumbass. Don’t fuck your homophobic bodyguard.”

“Admit it, Vlad. You’re loving this. You love being fucked. You pretend to be straight—but you’re actually”—Sebastian slammed into him—“a total cock slut.” Vlad moaned but stubbornly said nothing, even as his hips moved to meet Sebastian’s thrusts, powerful thighs enclosing Sebastian’s hips. God, he was so incredibly tight. Sebastian went still for a moment, reveling in the tightness around his cock and catching his breath. Vlad made an inpatient noise. “Move.” Sebastian stroked Vlad’s leaking cock lazily. “Gimme a moment. I’m tired.” It didn’t help that he could still feel the numerous bruises on his body. “Such a princess,” Vlad said before rolling them and straddling Sebastian’s thighs. He sank back onto Sebastian’s cock with a relieved moan. God, the sight of him... Sebastian watched, transfixed, as Vlad’s big, muscular body rode his cock, Vlad’s head thrown back in ecstasy, his mouth slack, Vlad’s hard cock looking delicious against his six-pack. Sebastian stared at that beautiful cock hungrily, wishing he could do two things at once: fuck Vlad’s ass and ride that thick cock.

Vlad had never felt so weak in the face of attraction. After days of just looking at Sebastian—looking and wanting his attention—his control was pitiful. He was drawn to this man like a bee to honey. Just a kiss, he told himself dazedly, staring at Sebastian’s mouth. Just one

Vlad stared at the sleeping man, trying to fight the resentment growing inside him. Rationally, he knew that this…obsession wasn’t Sebastian’s fault. He was a grown man, and he was the one responsible for his failings and for his lack of control. It wasn’t Sebastian’s fault that all this week he had felt like crawling out of his skin, wanting to see him. It hadn’t been an easy thing to accept. Vlad had been forced to stop living in denial when he’d caught himself expecting—wanting—to see Sebastian curled on Luke’s couch, his face buried in a thick book, chewing on his thumb whenever something interesting was happening in the book. Vlad hadn’t realized that he had mentally cataloged Sebastian’s every little quirk—that he had spent an unhealthy amount of time watching Sebastian— until he found himself with too much time and nothing to do while Luke worked in his study. He could no longer deny he had liked watching Sebastian, liked looking at him, as if Sebastian was a beautiful piece of art. Vlad didn’t like to think what that meant, because neither of the conclusions he had come to was particularly comfortable.

But sometimes their conversations turned ugly, or rather, the mood turned dark and tense. Sebastian had always been pretty empathic, and it took all of his self-control not to say anything when he saw the hint of shame and self-loathing on Vlad’s face after sex. It was obvious Vlad hadn’t gotten over his homophobic views—not that Sebastian had expected him to: that kind of homophobia was ingrained too deeply in him to overcome it so easily, if ever. Some people could never overcome their upbringing. Sebastian had to constantly remind himself it was none of his business. They had agreed that their arrangement was strictly casual and he wouldn’t have to deal with Vlad’s shit. Keeping emotional distance was the sensible thing to do in this situation. Vlad had warned him himself that he couldn’t promise him anything. Vlad would end this thing the moment he fucked his obsession out of his system. He was grateful for Vlad’s honesty, really. He had already been burned once; he didn’t need another homophobic guy to fuck him up and stomp all over his heart if Sebastian let him in. He couldn’t get too invested in Vlad. It was just sex—really intense, addictive sex, but just sex nonetheless. That was why he bit his tongue and said nothing when Vlad went very quiet and tense after sex. That was why he said nothing when Vlad fucked him extra hard, his face stony and his blue eyes closed off. That was why he said nothing as Vlad trailed his fingers over Sebastian’s face and chest when h...

The funny thing was, he hadn’t actually intended to end things with Sebastian. He had simply wanted to talk to him—Sebastian was the only person he felt remotely comfortable with to discuss his sexuality—but Sebastian had taken it the wrong way, interpreting Vlad’s discomfort as the desire to end things. After Sebastian suggested ending their arrangement, looking so fucking unbothered, Vlad could hardly say that he didn’t want to end it. Maybe he should have. And then what? Sebastian clearly didn’t want anything permanent with him. Hell, if he were in Sebastian’s shoes, he wouldn’t want anything permanent with him, either. Vlad came to an abrupt halt. Did he want something permanent with Sebastian? His heart started beating faster. He thought of being able to call Sebastian his, of being able to spend as much time with Sebastian as he wanted, of being the only man to touch him, to kiss him, to fuck him. He liked the idea. He liked it very much. But while his heart and his body were fully on board, he was a little queasy at the idea of a relationship with a man and doubted he would be any good for Sebastian. Vlad sighed. Well, listening to his brain only had turned him into one miserable fuck.

“I love you, you know.” It had been the first time he told the words to Vlad. They both kind of froze, staring at each other. But if Sebastian was a little surprised by his own declaration, Vlad looked absolutely floored, as if someone had pulled the ground from under him. “You can’t love me,” he said at last, his Adam’s apple moving. Sebastian smacked Vlad on the head. “What is that supposed to mean? I can love whoever I want, even a grumpy bear like you. You can’t tell me whether I love you or not.”

Sebastian’s eyes were suspiciously shiny. “Shut up,” he said, flushing when he noticed Vlad’s stare. “It’s kind of beautiful, isn’t it? Very romantic.” Vlad thought back to Tristan DuVal’s wedding vow that involved such words “I hated you at first sight, I still hate you for making me so soppy, and I promise to hate you till death do us part.” It didn’t sound very beautiful or romantic to him.