Fullness: A Memoir

by Azure Moyna

“I always knew that I was looking for a very particular type of person,” I started. “Someone who was driven, aspirational, educated, had a good career trajectory, but also someone who was street smart, had gone through a thing or two… and most importantly someone who would be understanding toward my crazy assed family. Basically, a successful and compassionate reformed bad-boy.”

“Expressing your needs growing up was not safe; even having your dad know your needs was not safe.” I nodded, “Because they would be used against me.”

Anxiety is a shapeshifter, born of your own imagination but looking so identical to your own worst fears made manifest that it’s able to convince you in an instant.

They say time heals all wounds but it takes more than time, just as gathering of ingredients and passing of time does not magically cook food. Only deliberate actions alchemize ingredients into something else, something better.