Too Late

by Colleen Hoover

“Don’t get up yet,” she says as she stands up. “Why not?” “Because. You need to sit there while I walk away so you can determine whether or not I really am a fine piece of ass.” She winks at me and spins around.

She glances over her shoulder before she walks out the door, and I bring my gaze back up to her eyes. I give her a thumbs up. She laughs and disappears out the classroom door.

“Well,” he says. “I sort of liked sitting by you the other day, so I thought I’d do it again. I take it that’s not what you want, so...” He begins to gather his books and a huge part of me wants to rip them from his hands and make him stay here, right where he is.

He’s everything I want, and everything I don’t need, and it literally, physically hurts.

it literally makes my heart ache, having to let go of his hand.

“You don’t want me to smile at you?” he asks, a confused expression strewn across his face. “No,” I say sharply. “I don’t. I don’t want you to smile at me like you like me. I don’t want you to sit next to me in class. I don’t want you to hold my hand. I don’t want you to flirt with me. I don’t even want you to buy me lunch, but I’m too hungry to really care about that one right now.”

“Sloan?” “Yeah?” she whispers. “I won’t let him hurt you.”

I clench his shirt in my fists and try again to scoot even closer to him, wanting to curl up inside of him and relish in this feeling forever. He lifts his cheek and lightly presses his lips against the top of my head.

I had no idea what it felt like to be valued. What it felt like to be respected. Until this moment, I had no idea what it felt like to be cared for. No one should have to experience a life never feeling truly cared for—not even by the parents who created them. Yet I’ve lived that for twenty years now. Until this moment.

She lifts her head and looks up at me, her eyes as red and swollen as I suddenly wish her lips were. Stop thinking like this, Luke. I stand up and she grabs at my shirt to pull me back, confusion rampant in her eyes. “Let go,” I whisper.

“You’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever met,” I whisper. “You are everything Asa doesn’t deserve. And...” I take a step closer and she tilts her head up as I lean in toward her and whisper, “And everything I want.”

he leans down and whispers, “For what it’s worth, you look really beautiful today. I kind of can’t catch my breath.”

That’s exactly what it feels like—my hand wrapped in his—him touching my leg. I feel like someone needs to douse me with water. My heart begins to race and I feel like my whole body is tingling. He’s holding my hand. Jesus fucking Christ.

Awh

“I just...I can’t be this close to you and not touch you.” “And I can’t not let you.”

He wraps his hand in my hair and presses his forehead against the side of my head. I have no idea what he’s doing, but the desperation in the way he’s pressed against me makes me wince. “Sloan,” he whispers, his mouth directly over my ear. “I want everything about you. So goddamn much. To the point that it’s blinding me.” I gasp at his words. “Please be careful,” he says. “Until I can help you get out of there. I don’t know when that’ll be, but please. Be very, very careful.” I squeeze my eyes shut when he presses a kiss to the side of my head. What I wouldn’t give for those lips to be pressing against my mouth right now.

“But know that you’re all I see. You’re all I fucking see, Sloan.”

“Love,” Carter says, his voice a little more slurred and a little bit louder. “Love is not found. Love finds.” Carter’s eyes move across the room until they land on mine. “Love finds you in the forgiveness at the tail end of a fight. Love finds you in the empathy you feel for someone else. Love finds you in the embrace that follows a tragedy. Love finds you in the celebration after the conquering of an illness. Love finds you in the devastation after the surrender to an illness.”

“I should go home,” I whisper. “I need to go before my stupidity gets you killed.” She nods and then desperately grips my arms. “Take me with you.”

“I would never do anything to hurt you. Ever. I swear on your brother’s life, Sloan.”

“Everything I’ve ever said to you. Every look I’ve given you. Every time I’ve touched you. It was never for the job, Sloan. Not one fucking time. Do you understand that?”

“You’re all I see, Sloan. Beyond the job, beyond right and wrong. You’re all I see.”

She leans forward and wraps her arms around my neck. “Luke,” she breathes against my lips. I fucking die. She called me Luke.

I close my eyes and she’s all I fucking see.

That sounds so cliché, even as I’m thinking it. But his hands, his mouth, the way he touches me—it’s like my response is what he lives for.

When we’re both no longer shaking, and I’m still on top of him, he leans forward and feathers his lips across my shoulder.

“I showered because I like to look good for you.

I smile the entire time I’m in the shower, because when I opened the back door and walked into a spotless kitchen, I knew without a doubt it had been Carter who cleaned it. No one—and I mean no one—has ever lifted a finger to help me around this house.

“Yes I do!” she screams. “I love him, I hate you, I love him, I fucking hate you!”

I close my eyes for the last time. But it’s okay, because she’s all I see. She’s the last thing I’ll ever see.

“That’s the sexiest thing about him,” I whisper. “His compassion.” He shrugs. “I don’t know...he’s got a great ass.”

“No one is taking care of me but you,”

Luke makes me feel like I’m floating.

Ryan rolls his eyes. “Tillie, Tillie, Tillie,” he says. “That was over a year ago and you still can’t stop thinking about my tongue in your mouth.” She nods. “Nightmares are hard to overcome.”

You aren’t alone this time. I’m here and I won’t let him hurt you. I swear.” I hold her until she falls asleep in my arms from pure exhaustion.

I love him. I really do. So damn much. I pull my face away from his chest and say, “I love you, Luke.” He cups my face and says, “I love you too, baby.” Then we kiss.

“I’ll love you forever, Luke. Only you.”

“I’m in love with you, Sloan. Madly in love with you.