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Was there anything in life more pleasurable than the sensation of striking a dark line through an item on one’s list with a pencil? Yes. There was the visceral sensation of taking out one’s pencil and striking a dark line through the last item on one’s daily list. Finishing a list had an almost talismanic quality, as if the act of turning intentions into words, then words into deeds, carried a subtle magic.
He looked the way laughter sounded; he was tapping his lips with one finger and smiling down at her with unholy glee. He had always looked like he was laughing at her.
“Chloe,” he said again. “It’s your decision. But please. Please never kiss a man who doesn’t think you deserve his effort.”
“I’ll luck you anytime you wish. But I don’t think anyone who has ever known you would imagine you to be so easily won. You’re not easy. You never have been.” She exhaled. “No.” A good reminder. “You have always been worth the effort.”
“And you’re not prickly. You’re decided. You’re the last thing from hard and prickly; you’re the most thoughtful person I know.”
“I want my wife to intimidate me. I want to know that her enemies will all fall before her. That’s the kind of woman I want by my side. She had better be intimidating.”
I know what he’s like.” He was brilliant like the sun. He made her laugh. He smiled at her. When he was in her company, he made her feel like she was the only woman on the planet.
“You’re the furthest thing from cold. You’re very interesting. You’re fun. You have things to do, and that makes you more fun.”
“The place you are,” Mr. Fong said, “is not permanent. Stop waiting. Work with what you have and who you are to make what you want to be. I am waiting to see what you will discover.”
Soft. Like a bunny rabbit. Ha. Maybe like a feral rabbit wearing battle armor while manning a cannon.
I could only say that you make me feel like the home I want to live in.”
“what part of ‘I want my wife to have exactly your qualities’ made you think I could ever want someone who was not you?”
She imagined her fears of frailty and abandonment as a heavy, spiked ball deep inside her. But she’d dealt with fears before. She thanked them for keeping her safe, acknowledged them for the work they had done in bringing her to this moment. And then she imagined taking that spiked ball out of her, holding it out as if it were a dandelion puff…and blowing all that fear away, to scatter in the wind.
Root out every poisonous vine. He saw it now, in startling clarity. Some of those vines cared for him, but that didn’t make their poison less toxic. He’d made excuse after excuse for his aunt. She loved him. She meant well. She wanted the best for him. None of that mattered. “I will not hear you speak of my mother that way. I will not hear you speak of my wife that way. And you will never tell my children that they are a mistake. Ever.”
