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This growth mindset is based on the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts, your strategies, and help from others. Although people may differ in every which way—in their initial talents and aptitudes, interests, or temperaments—everyone can change and grow through application and experience.
“I don’t divide the world into the weak and the strong, or the successes and the failures….I divide the world into the learners and nonlearners.”
Even in the growth mindset, failure can be a painful experience. But it doesn’t define you. It’s a problem to be faced, dealt with, and learned from.
The story of the tortoise and the hare, in trying to put forward the power of effort, gave effort a bad name. It reinforced the image that effort is for the plodders and suggested that in rare instances, when talented people dropped the ball, the plodder could sneak through.
Because the fixed mindset gives them no recipe for healing their wound, all they could do was hope to wound the person who inflicted it.
one of the most destructive beliefs for a relationship is “If we need to work at it, there’s something seriously wrong with our relationship.”
Relationship expert Daniel Wile says that choosing a partner is choosing a set of problems. There are no problem-free candidates. The trick is to acknowledge each other’s limitations, and build from there.
