All In (Full Tilt #2)

by Emma Scott

Every night, I called one final thought into the deep darkness: Come back to me.

I’m not ready to let him go, and it doesn’t feel like a choice anyway. It feels…impossible.”

“And how can I ever let go when there was still so much I didn’t do?”

You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same.—

For months after Jonah died, I cried for him to come back. I pleaded, and screamed, and prayed, and hoped, and nearly drank myself to death, begging for him to come back. I wanted so badly to believe, on some level, it was possible because the alternative was too horrible to contemplate. I jumped at knocks on my door, I flinched when my phone rang. I searched faces in the crowd when I walked, and tricked myself into thinking, sometimes, Jonah was standing right beside me.

It was a slow, agonizing journey to the moment I realized he was never coming back.