Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts

by Carol Tavris

Self-justification is complicated enough when it follows our conscious choices and we know we can expect it. But it also occurs in the aftermath of things we do for unconscious reasons, when we haven’t a clue about why we hold some belief or cling to some custom but are too proud to admit it. In the introduction, we described the custom of the Dinka and Nuer tribes of the Sudan, who extract several of the permanent front teeth of their children—a painful procedure, done with a fishhook. Anthropologists suggest that this tradition originated during an epidemic of lockjaw; missing front teeth would enable sufferers to get some nourishment. But if that was the reason, why in the world would the villagers continue this custom once the danger had passed? A practice that makes no sense at all to outsiders makes perfect sense when seen through the lens of dissonance theory. During the epidemic, the villagers might have begun extracting the front teeth of all their children so that if any of them later contracted tetanus, the adults would be able to feed them. But this is a painful thing to do to children, and in any case, only some would become infected. To further justify their actions, to themselves and their children, the villagers needed to bolster the decision by adding benefits to the procedure after the fact. Thus, they might convince themselves that missing teeth had aesthetic value—“Say, that sunken-chin look is really quite attractive”—and they might even turn the surgi...