Dungeon Crawler Carl (Dungeon Crawler Carl, #1)

by Matt Dinniman

“Intelligence told you that bike belonged to a police officer. Wisdom told you not to urinate upon it.

“Oh, sweetie,” said Donut, “as amusing as I would find it to watch Carl here disappoint yet another woman, we’re on a schedule. Banging monster girls is not the narrative we’re going for with this story. Maybe next time.”

Anyone who mistook fear for respect was a fool.