In any event, the emotions that surged when this happened came to serve as a kind of gauge I used to measure the intensity of my yearning. When I couldn’t get that sensation in the real world, I would quietly let my memory of those feelings awaken inside me. In this way, memory became one of my most valued emotional tools, a means of survival, even. Like a warm kitten, softly curled inside an oversized coat pocket, fast asleep.
