Responsibility Rebellion: An Unconventional Approach to Personal Empowerment

by Kain Ramsay

What you need to learn sooner rather than later is that no one in this world can out-love the self-hatred you have.

The only way you can achieve this is by learning how to master yourself and rebel against the messages which tell you that you aren’t enough.

Mastering yourself means being able to see things more clearly and accepting that your concept of ‘reality’ is nothing more than your perceptions of

They don’t need to rely on external validation because their self-esteem and self-worth aren’t tentatively balanced on the fleeting opinions of others.

The special snowflake syndrome is not just a millennial problem; we treat ourselves differently to how we treat others because we think of ourselves as unique beings

whose struggles are harder, whose circumstances are unparalleled, and whose wrongdoings, failures, flaws, and faults are more severe than any universal human fallibilities.

Whilst being unhappy with your figure may initiate negative self-talk which prompts you to join a gym and eat healthier, perpetually belittling and condescending your appearance and body shape isn’t going to empower you to make wise decisions.

Whilst this is undeniably an illogical and unhelpful way of thinking, we’re all guilty of falling into this mental pattern, and one of the most problematic ways you adopt this cognitive process is applying it to yourself.

To the same effect, most people are closed-minded about who they are, what their potential is, and how much power they have in the making of their lives and outcomes.

and it’s easier to tear yourself down and tell yourself what you’re not capable of than to try to be capable of something.

The problem is that there is no ‘truth’ to your reality. There are only perceptions. You have a perception of yourself, and every other person around you has a different perception of you, and you will never make these perceptions align, no matter how much you try. You’re

However, those of us who are more inclined to feel inferior to others due to crippling shame and self-hatred are more inclined to feel superior than those with confidence.

No truly confident or secure person ever feels superior to another, because their sense of self and worth isn’t dependent upon a comparison.

They had developed a self-sufficient vali...

Those with low self-esteem find themselves caught in the emotional chaos of the comparison flux: they feel amazing when they see someone doing worse than them in an area of life they’re self-conscious about (such as their career or hobbies) but feel depressed and miserable when they see someone thriving in that area.

No, they’re only prone to negative self-comparison because they’re addicted to positive self-comparison.

chasing a sense of significance through comparison. You can compare yourself to every single person

They spend their time investing in self-serving ambitions with the intention of either bettering themselves or impressing other people.

All of these elements of self-betterment aren’t innately harmful or bad, but the overemphasis of their importance leads to a life driven by the ego.

There’s no shame in loving fitness, education, your career, your mental well-being, or your health, provided they don’t consume you and rob the world of who you are and what you have to offer.

The tasks you build into your life for personal benefit should add more value to an ultimate goal which strives for external benefit and significance. Shifting

Purposefulness in life comes through sharing what you have to offer with others, and you are too great an entity to keep yourself all to yourself.

Becoming mindful and aware of your innate tendency to choose pleasure and instant gratification over hard work and discomfort is the first step in the process of personal mastery.

You will never be completely mindful of all your innate urges, but becoming conscious about impediments in your life (such as the pleasure principle) and subsequently forcing yourself to become aware and take note of where they play out will allow you to manage your productiveness more effectively.

This principle isn’t about harshly restricting yourself or overthinking the sacrifices you need to make. It’s about bringing awareness to the sacrifices and gains you make in life and weighing what the best outcome is for you at the phase of life you’re currently in.

Because change always requires time, energy, effort, reduction, and elimination, people facing the concept of change equate it to a loss rather than a gain, thus leading them to procrastinate on instigating any kind of change.

You can’t master who and how you are in the world without becoming mindful of your innate lapses in judgment.

The victim mindset chains you to the belief that your past defines you; that your mental health, skills, personality, and habits are permanent; and that the beliefs you adopted in your past due to your circumstances have more control over you than you do. The victim mindset tells you that you are powerless to determine and redirect your future or redefine your worth, and who you are today is who you will be forever.

People who take responsibility for their circumstances accept that bad things happen and situations can be difficult, distressing, and stressful at times, but they know they are responsible for finding a solution and implementing it.

Many people let their fear of failure, rejection, inadequacy, and loss run their lives.

What many people with a victim mentality don’t understand is that fear can serve them.

Powerful people understand they have no choice but to try to succeed in life, because succumbing to fear only feeds disempowerment, stagnancy, and unfulfilment.

When our goals in life strive to positively influence and impact the lives of others, our confidence shifts.

Beliefs which don’t move you forward, motivate you, or inspire you to grow and help others aren’t useful; they’re stagnating or regressive.

Because of the emotional pressure insecurities place on individuals, people are usually quick to find a solution to escape the discomfort and pain they’re going through. The solution is usually somewhat dramatic: they crash-diet or starve themselves, change their appearance through surgery or extreme cosmetics, quit their job, cut people out of their life, delete social media, become more aggressive or more complacent and reserved, break off their relationships, or over-exercise.

The worse you think about yourself, the worse you’re going to feel in life.

The key to emotional management is learning the difference between reacting to your emotions and responding to them.

A response evolves out of a person’s consideration for their feelings, the logic of the circumstances, the limitations of their perception of reality, and their core

Responses consider the long-term effects they cause, whereas reactions don’t take the future into consideration at

Reactions are disempowering. They cause us to rely on biases, assumptions, fears, negative emo...

Emotions shouldn’t be treated as an instruction manual but rather as a GPS. It’s not in your best interest to follow and succumb to the instructions dictated by your emotions.

the only things holding you back in life are the beliefs you have about yourself.

People become attached to their beliefs because their identities are so tightly wound up in them.

Overcoming limiting beliefs depends on a person’s willingness to challenge and replace their beliefs with contrasting ones which feel uncomfortable, unfamiliar, and potentially threatening to their sense of self.

Beliefs act like a set of rules you’re too frightened to break; rather than risk getting what you want in life, you’d rather remain in your comfort zone.

Your biases can cause you to expect the worst in others or be more attuned to their faults and flaws.

my old beliefs didn’t serve me and believing in this will only keep me stuck where I am.

Therefore, in the spirit of learning to live with yourself, you need to ask: what can I do, say or think that will impress, please, and satisfy me?