I Would Leave Me If I Could: A Collection of Poetry

by Halsey

I can’t carry all this weight, so I must put it somewhere and somewhere is with you. You will take good care of it?

I want to walk away from my bones and set them down on a counter like my keys after work.

I wish I had 11 hands with 55 fingers so I could paint and write and fuck and feed and grab grab grab everything.

I hope you’ll stay. I hope you’ll stay.

But I would leave me too, if I could.

And it was on my first day on Earth that I realized I didn’t measure up, and I never would.

“I have given so much to the page, please tell me I am not worthless.”

I can hold a grudge like it’s a hand.

Girls who weren’t sad and tired. Girls better than me. Who had learned to turn their trauma into adventures for him to stumble blindly through. Instead of wallowing in their brokenness and breaking everything in their path as penance.

Who had learned to turn their trauma into adventures for him to stumble blindly through. Instead of wallowing

in their brokenness and breaking everything in their...

Been biting my tongue till it bleeds cry over things I don’t need. My mother told me pick your battles wisely but you made me angry at the world so I chose them all.

I got this bad habit where I don’t think before I speak. I fall in love like every week.

I fucking hate parallel parking

word

I’m sorry I’m having another bad day. My tongue is twisted my words come out like venom.

I spent a long time substituting honest with sarcastic and I cursed my tongue for being mean.

and I’m too young to know why it aches in my thighs but I must lie. I must lie.

The year is 2018 and I’ve realized that nobody is safe as long as she is alive and every friend that I know has a story like mine.

And then yell at the top of your lungs. Be a voice for all those who have prisoner tongues, for the people who had to grow up way too young, there is work to be done, there are songs to be sung,

I wonder what I’ll ever have control of.

I keep it all inside my mind and every night I scream.

I can’t remember what it’s like to face a mirror and not hate the person staring back at me.

I would leave me if I could.

But does she scream at the top of her lungs praying you don’t leave her?