Halfway to the Grave (Night Huntress, #1)

by Jeaniene Frost

“Cat, hmmm? From where I sit you look more like a Kitten.” My head jerked around and I shot him an annoyed look. Oh, I was going to enjoy this, all right. “It’s Cat,” I repeated firmly. “Cat Raven.” “Whatever you say, Kitten Tweedy.”

😍🤣

“Winston poltergeisted my panties, that’s what!” I announced with a loud hiccup. “Why, you scurvy, lecherous spook!” Bones yelled in the direction of the cemetery. “If my pipes still worked, I’d go right back there and piss on your grave!”

Bahaha

“Do you think I’m pretty?” I heard myself ask. Something I couldn’t name flashed across his face. “No. I don’t think you’re pretty. I think you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

“Winston liked me. As long as I have moonshine, I’ve always got a date with a ghost!” “I hate to inform you, luv, but you and Winston don’t have a future together.” “Says who?” I laughed, noticing that the trees were tilted sideways. That was weird. And they seemed to be spinning as well. Bones lifted my head up. I blinked. The trees were straight again! Then all I could see was his face as he leaned very close. “I say.”

Tee hee hee

“Is that a stake, Bones, or are you just happy with my new dress?” He gave me a grin that was filled with more innuendo than an hour’s worth of conversation. “In this case, it’s a stake. You could always feel around for something more, though. See what comes up.”

“I’ve got it!” he declared suddenly, snapping his fingers in triumph. “Take your knickers off.” “What?” Did that mean what I think it did? “Your knickers. You know—panties, underwear, muff-huggers, nasty nets—” “Are you out of your mind?” I interrupted. “This is where I draw the line! What does my underwear have to do with anything? I am not flashing my…my crotch at someone, no matter what you say!”

Ohmygosh, Bones 🙄🤣

“Will you stop?” I fought to alleviate my intense embarrassment. “I get the picture! Stop drawing it, okay? God, but you are—are…profane!”

but I promise you this—at no point would I have forced myself on you. Sorry, Kitten. Every woman I’ve been with has wanted me to be there. Have I killed any innocents in my time? Yeah, I have. When you’ve lived as long as I have, you make mistakes. You try to learn from them. And you shouldn’t be so quick to judge me on that. No doubt you’ve killed innocents as well.”

“What?” Curiosity killed the cat; I hoped for better results.

Bones chuckled. “Is that why you think I stay there? Out of lack of funds?” His clear amusement made me defensive. “Why else? It’s not a Hilton. You have to pirate electricity and you wash in an ice-cold river. I didn’t think you did that just because you liked seeing your parts shrink!” That really made him laugh. “Concerned for my bits and pieces, are you? Let me assure you, they’re fine. Of course, if you don’t take my word for it, you could always—”

🤣🤭

“Can we get on to business? Like the details about tonight?” “Oh, that.” We descended deeper into the cave. “Let’s see, your bloke’s over two hundred years old, naturally brown hair, but he changes his color periodically, talks with an accent, and is very quick in combat. Good news is, you can keep your knickers on. He’ll be smitten with you on sight. Any questions?” “What’s his name?” “He’ll probably make one up, most vampires do, but his name is Crispin.

Tee hee hee 👉👈

“Kitten, you need to make a decision. Either we stay here and behave or we leave now and I promise you”—his voice dipped lower and the words fell against my lips—“if we leave, I won’t behave.”

🔥🔥🔥

Now I have training and backup, and you still want me to turn tail and run? Don’t kiss me like a woman if you’re going to treat me like a child.” Bones stared down at me with frustration. “This isn’t about treating you like a child. Bugger, I clearly don’t see you that way!

My eyes flew open, and for the second time in my life I woke up in bed with a vampire. This time was infinitely worse, because all I wore was a shirt and panties and he… A scream tore out of my throat. Bones leapt up, head swiveling around to spot the danger. Immediately I looked away, because I’d spotted the danger, all right. Color rose in my face and I squeezed my eyes shut. “What’s wrong? Someone here?” His voice was insistent and deadly.

🤭

I know what’s bothering me.” The smoothly bantering tone changed to a low, furious growl. “What’s bothering me is that you dare to stand there and tell me what I do and do not feel about last night. That kissing you and holding you meant nothing to me. Then, to top it all off, that you were only reacting to me because you were impaired! That’s rich. You know what those drugs did to you in the first dose, before the second one made you comatose? They killed the bug up your arse!”

Yeah, my biggest complaint against Cat is how unfairly she treats Bones in the beginning of their relationship. Poor man just finally needs someone to love and trust him 😭❤️

She’s probably just mesmerized by how pale you are, I told myself, trying to shake off the unease that had taken hold of me. You’re like a snowman with tits.

He matched his tongue to his body as he stroked me, bringing that previous ache back with reinforcements. “You tell me when,” he murmured, long moments later. “Or not at all. We don’t have to go further yet. I’ll spend the rest of the night tasting you, Kitten, I loved that. Let me show you how much.” Bones dragged his mouth purposefully lower, but I held him to keep him where he was. “Tell me,” he moaned as a twist of his hips forced a cry from me.

Gah!! I love him 😩💘

“Oh, well, isn’t that nice? You are a nice young girl. Be a good friend to her and set her straight. She has love bruises on her neck and didn’t come home until this afternoon.” Sweet Holy Jesus, why couldn’t the ground just swallow me? Bones stifled a laugh and nodded solemnly. “Don’t fret, Grannie. We’re going to a Bible retreat to scare the devil out of her.”

BAHAHA!!!

“You be sweet to our boy here, and remember, be good only if being bad ain’t more fun!”

“I can’t just let us go our separate ways, Kitten, because I am in love with you. I love you.”

He let out a snort and dropped his hand. “You know, pet, that is one truly annoying habit you have, telling me what I do and do not feel. After living for well over two hundred years, I think I know my own mind.”

I agree 🙄

That’s why I didn’t say anything before, because I never wanted you to wonder if I were merely lying to cajole you into bed. However, to be rudely blunt, I’ve already gotten you on your back, and it wasn’t by declaring my devotion to you. I simply don’t care to hide my feelings any longer.”

and you’re even more afraid of what your dear mum would say.” “Oh, she’d have plenty to say, you can bet on that,” I muttered. “I’ve faced death more times than I can count, Kitten, and this instance with Hennessey is no different—do you really think the wrath of your mum is going to scare me away?” “It would if you were smart.” Also muttered. “Then consider me the stupidest man in the world.”

Tee hee hee

I loved the way he kissed me. Like he was drinking in the taste of me and still coming back thirsty.

I won’t be your girlfriend and your employee at the same time. Really, the choice is yours. Pay me, and I stop sleeping with you. Keep the money, and we continue on in bed.” Bones laughed outright, coming over to where I sat. “And you wonder why I love you. When you boil it all down, you’re paying me to shag you, for as soon as I stop, I owe you twenty percent of every contract I take. Blimey, Kitten, you’ve turned me back into a whore.” “That’s…that’s not…Dammit, you know what I meant!”

🤣

“No, I’m too tired to run, and you’re too fast. You’d only catch me.” “That’s right, luv.” Softly, but with unyielding resonance. “If you run from me, I’ll chase you. And I’ll find you.”

This is both heartbreaking and heart melting 😭❤️‍🔥

“Lucifer’s bouncing balls, Kitten, not again!” Uh-oh. I squirmed, instinctively also trying to block Tony’s body from his view. As if that made him any less dead. “She was going to stab you,” I said in my defense. “Look in her hand!” He was looking at the ground near my feet instead. “Him, too?” I nodded, sheepish. “He jumped me.” Bones just stared. “You’re not a woman,” he said finally. “You’re the Grim Reaper with red hair!”

I marched over to Bones and stuck my finger in his chest. He regarded me with what I would have called sullenness—if he hadn’t been over two hundred. “You have a choice,” I said, biting off each word. “Either you make a very sincere apology to Timmie now, or you leave and slither back to your cave like the festering ball sack you just acted like. I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but he’s a nice guy, and you probably just made him pee his pants. Your decision, Bones. One or the other.” A dark brow arched at me. I tapped my foot. “One…two…” He muttered something foul and then climbed the stairs, rapping twice on Timmie’s door.

🤣

“Nice to meet you, mate, and here’s some advice: Don’t even think about it. You try anything with her and I’ll neuter you with my bare hands.” “Leave!” I stamped my foot for emphasis. He swept past me and then swiveled, kissing me hard on the mouth before jumping back to avoid my right hook. “I’ll see you later, Kitten.”

Tee hee hee

I’d just been fantasizing about whipping two of the knives out of my jacket and flinging them into her double-Ds. “Francesca, this is Cat,” Bones said next, gesturing to me. “She’s with me, so you need not hesitate about speaking freely with her present.” I advanced with something stretching my face that may or may not have been a smile. “Hi. We’re sleeping together.” I heard it come out of my mouth in a detached sort of way, only mildly noticing Spade mutter something about this not being a wise idea and that both of Bones’s eyebrows shot into his hairline.

“Aside from the obvious, Francesca, what do you want in return for supplying information?” Bones asked, getting back to the subject. “You to take me,” she replied at once. “Not gonna happen!” I spat, squeezing him possessively. Three sets of widened eyes fixed on me. That’s when I realized that what I had a firm grip on was no longer his hand. Spade started to laugh even as I turned beet red again, yanking my hand back and fighting the urge to sit on it for my own good. Dear God! What had gotten into me? Bones’s lips twitched, but he didn’t join in the growing chuckles that had Spade dabbing at his eyes. “That’s not what she means, luv,” he said in a carefully neutral tone.

BAHAHAHA

We’re territorial, every last one of us, which is why I had such a harsh reaction when I saw Timmie gaze at you with those smitten-calf eyes. Your similar, decidedly hostile response with Francesca showed me…that you consider me to be yours. I have wondered what you felt for me, Kitten. Hoped you cared beyond mere rapport or physical attraction, and so while I assure you that you have nothing to fear from her, I was selfishly pleased to see how deep your emotions ran.”

“But what did smashing his hand accomplish? We won’t know if Hennessey or Switch comes tonight. What if one of them do, and they nab someone? Danny isn’t worth a woman’s life because he slept with me and then dumped me!” “I love you. You have no idea what you’re worth to me.”

😍

“What’s your full name? I already know it, of course, but I want to hear you say it.” “Catherine Kathleen Crawfield. But you can call me Cat.” This last part was said with a smile because he had never addressed me in any way but one. “I think I’ll stay with Kitten.” He smiled back, the tension easing. “It’s what you reminded me of when we met. An angry, defiant, brave little kitten. And every once in a while you’re cuddly like one.”

😆🥰🫠

“Fine. I promise I won’t kill him.” He said it too easily. My eyes narrowed. “Promise me right here and now that you will also never cripple, maim, dismember, blind, torture, bleed, or otherwise inflict any injury on Danny Milton. Or otherwise stand by while someone else does as you watch.” “Blimey, that’s not fair!” he protested.

🤣

Look, I’m not insisting to meet your mum. All I’m saying is that sooner or later, you’ll have to come to terms with yourself. You can’t wish away the vampire in you, and you shouldn’t keep atoning for it. You should figure out who you are and what you need, and then don’t apologize for it. Not to me, to your mum, or to anyone.”

😍

“What are you doing, Kitten?” “Overcoming my former prejudice. You’re a vampire. You drink blood. I’ve drunk yours and now I want you to have mine.” He stared at me for a long moment, and then shook his head. “No. You don’t really want that.” “Your fangs don’t scare me,” I breathed. “And neither do you. I want my blood inside you, Bones. I want to know it’s running through your veins….”

“You won’t stop until you have all of me, will you? My body, my blood, my trust…and still you want more.” He knew of what I spoke and his reply was immediate. “I want your heart the most. Above all else. You’re exactly right, I won’t stop until I have it.” Tears began to slide down my cheeks, because I couldn’t hold the truth back anymore. I didn’t know how I’d managed to hold it back this long. “You have it already. So now you can stop.” His whole body stilled. “You mean that?”

“Say it. I need to hear the words. Tell me.” I licked my lips and cleared my throat. It took three times, but finally my voice returned. “I love you, Bones.” A weight seemed to lift from me I hadn’t known was there. Funny how much I’d feared something that shouldn’t have frightened me at all. “Again.” He started to smile, and a beautiful, pure joy filled up the emptiness I’d carried my entire life. “I love you.” He kissed my forehead, cheeks, eyelids, and chin, feather-soft brushes that had the impact of a locomotive. “Once more.” The request was muffled by his mouth on mine and I breathed the words into him. “I love you.” Bones kissed me until my head reeled and everything tilted even though I was lying flat. He only paused long enough to whisper onto my lips, “It was well worth the wait.”

😭❤️‍🔥

“I know what you’re thinking and you’re wrong. This isn’t goodbye, Kitten. I didn’t survive over two hundred years to find you only to lose you within five months. I want you, but I’m not saying goodbye to you, because we will get through this.”

Bradley gave me a look of thinly veiled disgust. I’d had enough of that. “Oh, shove it up your ass, if you can fit anything in that tight GI shit-shoot!”

🤣

He stood, but swayed and gave me a very unpleasant look. “You hit me again and I’ll—” “What? Bleed more? Thanks, but I only drink gin and tonic. That’s one vampire attribute I’m without. No fangs, see?”

🤣

“I want you to know that despite everything, I’m so glad I met you,” I choked out. “It was the luckiest day of my life. If I hadn’t, I never would have known what it was like for someone to love me, all of me, even the parts I hated. I would have gone through life empty and guilt-ridden, but you showed me a whole new world, Bones. I’ll never be able to thank you for all you’ve done for me, but I will love you every day until I die.”

“Kitten,” he moaned as he drew me down onto the bed. “I only thought I was living before I met you. You’ll love me until you die? That’s not nearly long enough….”

😭❤️‍🔥