“I get fucked a lot, Doc,” I said. “Like, SO MUCH— figuratively speaking I don’t have a mother, a last name, or a goal or purpose in life. I’m just a hole.” I stopped just short of saying, “My only desire is to be desired. I feel like the whole equation cancels itself out and what it really means is I have no will—I can (at will) rip out all sense of self just so a boy can have one more hole to fuck me in. I’m afraid of this terrible power I wield, I just wait to be wanted, it’s killing me, Doctor…”
