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December 2 - December 22, 2025
“There is no side of you that is not as beautiful as the other half. Not a single inch isn’t stunning.”
“That was true the first time I said it to you, and it is still the truth today and tomorrow.”
I’d believed him then. And I’d felt beautiful for the first time in my life,
What, if anything, could he feel for me?
I wasn’t a small child now, incapable of defending myself. I wasn’t weak. I wasn’t prey.
Did you ever care for me? Was any of it real?
“You’re beautiful when you’re quiet and somber, but when you laugh? You rival the sunrise over the Skotos Mountains.”
being pragmatic and rational was the only way to win a battle and survive a war.
“I wouldn’t confuse submission for distraction, and I wouldn’t mistake obedience for stupidity when it’s apparent that you know very little about the people of Solis,”
But fearing what you’re capable of doesn’t mean I fear you.”
“Sorry,”
“You never need to apologize for a hug, Penellaphe.
“I’ll heal,” he said gruffly. “The others, not as easily.” “I know.” I knelt. “That doesn’t mean you need to be in pain.”
“I’m still not done, Princess.” My pulse thrummed. “No?” “No.” His forehead dropped to mine. “There is one more thing I need. Something that I’ve needed for days. Weeks. Months. Maybe forever.” The bridge of his nose brushed mine. “But I know you won’t allow it. Not like this.” The pounding in my chest moved lower. “What…what have you needed for so long?” “You.” I shuddered. “So, maybe, just for a few minutes, when no one is looking—when there’s no one but us—we can pretend.” Leaning into the cupboard, I felt dizzy, as if I weren’t getting enough air into my lungs. “Pretend?” “We pretend that
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“Let me help you replace the fear and helplessness. I can erase it. I promise,” he whispered, guiding me back until I was lying down once more. “Let me be enough, at least for tonight.”
“But does the present really make amends for the past?” Casteel didn’t answer immediately. “Who is the judge of that? The gods? They sleep. Society? How can they make decisions unbiasedly when they are prejudiced by their own sins?”
“I think it comes down to whether you can make amends with yourself.”
“When you leave and go out into the world and find yourself a mate who has never lied—” “Or kidnapped me?” “Or kidnapped you, there should be no stabbing or punching. Only kisses and promises upheld until dying breaths and beyond,” he said. “That is what you deserve from who you choose to love.”
That went beyond submission and straight into willful ignorance.
“Honeydew,” Casteel whispered. He grabbed the halves of my robe, tugging it over my hips and my thighs. His hands lingered there, a faint tremor coursing through them as he lifted his gaze to mine once more. “I’m sorry.” And then he rose from the bed and walked out of the terrace doors, past Kieran, without saying another word.
How could I want him so badly that I didn’t care about what he did or who he was? Or what he might do to me?
“Forcing a warrior to don a veil of submission was never going to last.”
“Wait.” He swung his head toward mine. “Do you even know what could happen during that ritual that would make it so very crude—” “I know what could happen,” I snapped. “Is it because of that diary?” “Shut up.” “Did you bookmark the chapters detailing how Willa spent afternoons entertaining not one but two suitors, one in front and the other—?” “You seem to know a lot about that book.” “I love that fucking book,”
“I’m so incredibly unworthy of you,”
“Can I…can I just hold you?” he asked, and I’d never heard him sound so uncertain. “There are things I should be doing, and I know we’re not in public, and I know that what we shared doesn’t change anything, but…can I…can we just pretend?”
“Or is it because you don’t want to know that it’s taking everything in me not to ruin yet another pair of your pants by ripping them off and fucking you so hard that days from now, you’ll still be able to feel the extent of my gratitude.”
I wanted his hands on me, soothing away the sting of guilt and the feeling that I was betraying myself.
There was the bitter taste of fear, because he was no fool, but it was such a small amount because he was no coward.
“I need to feel your lips on mine.” He planted his hands on the carriage wall, caging me in. “I need to feel your breath in my lungs. I need to feel your life inside me. I just need you. It’s an ache. This need. Can I have you? All of you?”
