But this is precisely what is sought by those individuals who provoke rejection. That is, that they should be allowed to give full expression to their shadow, and that they should be loved for the punishment which it inflicts—they feel that only then will they experience true acceptance and love. This throws a somewhat different light on the problem and points to a need to get closer rather than to a fear of being close. To put it another way, there is a deep need to rid oneself of the guilt and fear-provoking elements of the shadow, which is why it is continually being brought into those
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