fast

by Millie Belizaire

Sometimes the monsters we create in our mind—in our memories—are so much scarier than the real thing. Gracie could be that kind of monster for you.”

you can give a victim every resource in the world, but that final push towards healing and self-acceptance… It comes from within.

“Protect me now by keeping Kahfi safe. You have to make him happy. You have to make sure he’s safe. If Kahfi is happy, then me and Marron don’t never need to come out. That’s the way.” Moreno looked at me like someone getting ready to say goodbye, tears still streaming down his little face. “Me and Marron were never supposed to be here in the first place.”

“Some days she’s in high spirits, but most days… There’s just something about almost dying, I guess. It changes you. When I was a kid, I had all these dreams. I thought I was gonna put my mom in a big ass house, buy her whatever she wanted, and really make her happy. Who would’ve thought the moment I was able to give her all those things, she’d be the saddest version of herself she’s ever been?”

Of course, I chose her. I would always choose Caprice.

I didn’t let her go. I didn’t pull out. I understood the possible risk that came with what I’d done, but is it really all that risky if that possibility is something that I want?

With time came realistic expectations. With experience came strength and preparedness for any outcome. I would be devastated if I lost Caprice again somehow, but it didn’t kill me before, and it wouldn’t kill me now. Age allowed me to understand that pain is unavoidable, and you’d live a very meaningless life trying to avoid it.

Caprice had always been the one.

“When I was a little girl, I used to wish that you were my mom,” she said. My mother’s smile was a little sad, her hand reaching across the table to settle on top of Caprice’s. “You were already like a daughter to me, Caprice. Everything I ever wanted in a daughter, really. When I realized just how much my son loved you—” My mother glanced at me before looking back at Caprice, and I knew what she was about to say. “I realized that it was only a matter of time before you really would be.”

However, there are millions of children like Caprice and Kahfi all over the world. So, if you see something, say something.