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“You are spectacular, Jasmine Olsen,” he whispered. “Don’t you ever forget that.”
That’s what his gaze did to me, what it always had done. It stripped me bare.
Held me? Touched my face the way you did all those years ago? Leaned in like you wanted to kiss me, like you wanted to breathe me in? Told me I was spectacular?
“Because I miss you!”
“Because I miss you. Because I have missed you, ever since the day you left. Because it kills me to be around you and not touch you, laugh with you, to not be engulfed with everything that you are.”
“I told him he was an idiot and a jerk for taking advantage of you in a moment like that. I mean, sure, I knew he had a crush on you — he had since the day you two met.”
“I would have run to you,” he said softly over the rain, his lips touching mine as he did. “I would have pulled you into me. And I would have never let you go.”
“You are my weakness, Jaz,” he husked. “You always have been.”
I couldn’t be just friends with him. And I couldn’t be more. Which meant we only had one option of what we could be. Nothing.
“How can I not?”
“You’re hurting, and it’s killing me, and I don’t know how to fix it other than to pull you into me and try to shield you from whatever it is that’s bringing you pain.”
“It’s...
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“It’s you who brings me pain. It’s you who is killing me. It’s you, and us,” I added, motioning between us. “It’s this thing that never was, but always is, that never will be and will never not be.”
“I have tried to forget you, Tyler. For seven long years, I ran from you, and from that day, and from all those years we had together. I thought I’d grown. I thought I’d left you behind.
“But what I thought about most?” he whispered. “Was how you said you loved me. I replayed it a million times — the way your lips formed around the words, the
way your eyes were glossed with
tears and pain that I’d caused you, the way I felt that declaration so deep inside me that it might as well ...
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“I’m saying that you are spectacular, Jasmine Olsen, and that I love you with everything that I am.”