The Body Is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love

by Sonya Renee Taylor

“The dive is a spiritual thing,” Davide said. “I learn how to listen to my body. I must listen or I will die. In the water, I must learn the difference between fear and danger.” He did not know it, but Davide was describing the journey of radical self-love. It is damn scary to probe the depths of the thoughts, ideas, and subconscious principles governing our daily lives. To be fear-facing is to learn the distinction between fear and danger. It is to look directly at the source of the fear and assess if we are truly in peril or if we are simply afraid of the unknown. The unknown is like fog, and, of course, fog is frightening. Who knows what obstructions could be lurking about? What if there is a deer soon to be splayed on my windshield? What if I careen off a cliff while driving in the thick soup of fog? Living with body shame and body terrorism is to be stuck in an endless “what if” fog: a place of inertia. The only way out of the fog is through it. We must dive into the unknown, trusting that our bodies will help us discern fear from danger. There is always a clearing on the other side of the fog. To be fear-facing is to navigate cautiously and with alertness but to continue our journey.