Sad Janet: A Novel

by Lucie Britsch

I didn’t know how other girls did it, any of it, so I made it up as I went.

At college I’d wanted to live on my own, in a cave, but there were no caves available. I ended up sharing a house with three girls I failed to bond with, and now I have to lug that failure around with me, with all my others, for the rest of my life.

I just don’t use my phone to call people, in the hope that people will return the favor by not calling me.

When I finally get inside my apartment, I dump my bag on the floor and sit beside it, processing our conversation. Sometimes I feel like I need to do this every time I interact with anyone who isn’t a dog.

I’ll probably just have a little cry and fall asleep to Law & Order like a normal person.

I want to do what men do all the time—externalize my feelings, instead of internalizing them and making myself sicker.