“You are allowed to—in fact, you are almost required to—continually monitor your sense of self and to look inward to see how well your inner life fits with your marriage or cohabiting life. If the fit deteriorates, you are almost required to leave…[A] relationship that no longer fits your needs is inauthentic and hollow. It limits the personal rewards that you can achieve.” Cherlin’s comments are apt for the way that many think about today’s broader family relationships. If it constrains your personal rewards, you need to get out. Failing to do so is a sign of weakness, of existential
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