You can be as rude as you want to your friends, family or social equals. If you want to mistreat them, and they are dumb or weak enough to let you get away with it, that’s between you and them. They are your social equals, and therefore they are in a position to defend themselves. However, staff are not your social equals. They are therefore at a disadvantage from the word go. Treating them indecorously breaches every code of noblesse oblige, and as that matters greatly to people who regard nobility as a commendable aim in life, once you acquire a reputation for mistreating those who work for
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