Truly

by Carmel Rhodes

Tall with dark hair, whiskey eyes, and pouty lips.

Noah Tedesco is hot, I’ll give him that, but so was Ted Bundy.

Life is like a sink full of dirty dishes—you stick your hand in, and hope there isn’t a knife at the bottom.

“You can’t just quit something because it’s hard. If you make a commitment, you honor it.”

He kisses me as if he’s trying to possess me. As if he’s depositing little bits of himself inside me to own me from the inside out.

If I give Noah Tedesco an inch, he’ll take my virginity.

Noah is like a toddler trapped in a six-foot-three, grown-ass, muscly-ass man’s body. No simply means, I’ll push and fight and cry until you say yes.

“I don’t handle him.” Ha! Me, handle Noah? He’s like a natural disaster, wild and unpredictable. I don’t handle him so much as I’ve adapted to him. I’ve learned to withstand him.

Apologetic Noah is a lot better for my mental health than I want your innocence smeared on my cock Noah.

God, they were so in love. They had the kind of love people write songs about. A love so deep, he still hasn’t moved on.

Papa Parker 🥰

Maybe that’s why I lost myself in Devin, even though we were as different as night and day. I wanted a love like my parents had.

“I’ve always noticed you, Little One. Now, stop deflecting and answer the fucking question.” I blink at him, torn between wanting to throat punch him and kiss him.

“It’s only settling if the bad outweighs the good. I can search my whole life for the perfect man and never find him. I want a real man who loves me, one who may not be everything I want, but who’s willing to be what I need.”

Say it Becca! 🙌🏾

Noah likes to dominate me. He likes to hurt me. My scalp is still prickling as evidence to that fact, but he also seems to care about me in his own twisted way. And maybe that makes my own twisted heart beat just a little harder for him.

Noah’s here, and despite the bouquet of red flags he’s offering like roses, I haven’t run away.

“Are you happy? Do you want me to come pick you up?” His concern is palpable, even through the phone. “I’m in Louisiana.” My smile is genuine this time. That’s my dad, my hero. The man who uprooted his life in Chicago and took a huge pay cut to move to Georgia so that I could grow up with family. I don’t know what I did to deserve him, but I’m happy he’s mine.

🫶🏾

Only Noah can make me want to kill him and kiss him at the same time.

Noah and I have a toxic relationship at best. At worst, we’ll end up killing each other.

Noah snorts, pulling me even closer. Whenever I’m around, he has to touch me. It doesn’t matter if we’re in the middle of a Target or in the middle of nowhere. If I’m there, his hands are on me, dictating my every move. It’s like he’s the sun, and I’m trapped in his orbit. I often worry about flying too close, then I remember he’s already burned me.

There are a few things I’ve learned about Noah since he forced his way into my life with a sledgehammer. One: if he gets something in his mind, there’s no point in trying to stop him. B: he’ll do just about anything for me, aside from leave me alone. I don’t know if it’s because he feels guilty about the treehouse or if he actually does care, but I’m pretty sure if I asked him to do the hokey pokey wearing a pink tutu, he’d do it. Then he’d wrap the tutu around my neck and fuck me senseless for asking in the first place.

Noah Tedesco is a lot of things. An asshole with violent tendencies mostly, but he’s also oddly thoughtful. He remembers everything, even stuff I toss out as throwaway conversation, he stores. It’s a part of why he’s so good at manipulation, but it’s also kind of sexy.

When he kisses me, I feel seen. I feel cherished, like I am the center of his universe.

Swoon!

I loved Devin—at least I thought I did. But Noah…he’s my greatest vice. Toxic, dangerous, and yet I’m so completely addicted, I’d willingly drown in his possession.

“Mine.” “Yours,” I agree.

Noah has a way of bringing out the most extreme emotions in me. From hate to fear to obsession to longing. He is whiskey in a wine glass, fire and spice hiding in a pretty polished package.

“I’m not your prince, Truly. Our story isn’t a fairytale. I don’t vow to always be kind, or do what the world deems as right, but I will always do right by you. I will always protect you. Plus,” he pauses, and I can feel the corner of his mouth tip up, “I’ll fuck you better than the prince ever could.”

I’m falling for this boy, this monster who has done nothing but steamroll his way into my life and claim me as his.

“I like pain because I feel like I deserve it. You like inflicting pain because it gives you power.” “We’re both fucked in the head,” he grunts. I press my palm to his heart. It beats erratic and wild, broken like mine. “Maybe we’re fucked in the heart, too.”

After a rocky start, this summer ended up being everything I wanted and a few things I didn’t know I needed. Three weeks. Six states. Four best friends.

“You’re my girl, Truly. The only person who could ever change that is you.”

I suck in a shaky breath. “You mean the world to me. What we had, it saved me, and I will forever be grateful for your presence in my life. But with Noah, I had the kind of love my parents had, that Jamal and Melody Parker kind of love. I can’t just pretend like it never happened, and deep down, you know that you can’t either.”

“Also, I want my hoodie back.” He taps a few buttons on my phone, then hands it back before tucking a strand of hair behind my ear and bopping me on the nose. “Hoodies are for girlfriends. You can have it back when I can have you back.”