“There should be divorce reveals,” I said. “Like when people reveal that they’re pregnant and they make a crazy video or they reveal the genitals of the baby by cutting into a cake that’s either penis or vagina.” (Clarification: The penis cake is blue. The vagina cake is pink. It’s not a cake made of penises and vaginas. It’s made of food coloring and far too much trust in your cake decorator. Once I picked up Hailey’s fifth-birthday cake and for some reason it said “HAPPY GRADUATION” on it. I told her it was because she’d graduated to the next year and she was fine, but what if the decorator
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