My Name Is Anton

by Catherine Ryan Hyde

He had not indulged that release because of a deep fear that, having allowed the tears to start, he would never find the end of them, or would find they had no end at all.

Love is when you can make the following statement, and mean it: ‘What’s best for her, even if it doesn’t include me.’

“Yeah, well. Having kids makes you a parent, but it doesn’t automatically make you good at it.”

You shouldn’t have to apologize for what you want. We just don’t always get what we want in this world. That’s the thing about life. That’s the way it is.”

“I think I got tired of being angry. Now everything just seems incredibly sad. And I like that better.” “Why is sadness better?” “Because . . . you don’t have to do anything about it. You can just hold still, and it’s not so tiring all the time. Nothing needs fixing. It just is, and it’s sad.”

All he could think was that he had stayed with her so as not to hurt her feelings. And now he was hurting her so much more deeply. In that heavy pause, she finally began to catch the mood of the moment.

Her voice was . . . everything. It was saving him. It was bringing him down to the ground, into the world, and he didn’t even mind being there. He could listen to that voice all night.

I’ll think how much I love you and for a minute it’s hard to breathe.”

“Because when everything is so good like this . . . when you just feel like life is perfect and you have everything you want . . . don’t you ever feel . . . like you’re waiting for a shoe to drop?”

If I made a list of all the things in life in the order I was willing to give them up, you’d be the last entry. Right after oxygen.”