Better Small Talk: Talk to Anyone, Avoid Awkwardness, Generate Deep Conversations, and Make Real Friends
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The simple act of engaging people in short bursts has been shown to make us happier and more inclined to be social, and it will also help us mentally and psychologically warm up to be our best in conversations and small talk no matter the context.
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We need to engage in more short interactions—or what researcher Steven Handel calls “ten-second relationships”—with others, because they have the potential to boost our moods, change our perspectives, and warm us up socially.
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This is why very attractive people can almost become immune to compliments about their appearance—they know how little they had to do to be attractive, so it doesn’t feel like a real compliment to them at all.
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The more outrageous something might be, the more valuable positive confirmation is. Therefore, when you compliment someone on their choices and thoughts, you validate them to the highest degree.