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November 25 - November 26, 2022
You can sum up Stoicism with one simple idea: you need to accept full control of and take total responsibility for your thoughts and actions.
Stoicism states that an individual shouldn’t allow themselves to be driven by either fear or a thirst for pleasure, but instead should seek to understand the world in which we live, find and fulfil your place in nature, and work in harmony with others, dealing with them in a fair and just manner.
“Don’t seek for everything to happen as you wish it would, but rather wish that everything happens as it actually will—then your life will flow well.”
The Stoics sought freedom from being ruled by their passions by using logic and reason. They weren’t looking to eliminate their emotions so much as transcend them by developing clarity of thought and inner peace. They looked to achieve a high degree of self-control, self-awareness and self-discipline.
“If evil be spoken of you and it be true, correct yourself, if it be a lie, laugh at it.” – Epictetus
“We should every night call ourselves to an account: what infirmity have I mastered today? what passions opposed? what temptation resisted? what virtue acquired? Our vices will abate of themselves if they be brought every day to the shrift.” – Seneca
“Time is a sort of river of passing events, and strong is its current; no sooner is a thing brought to sight than it is swept by and another takes its place, and this too will be swept away.” – Marcus Aurelius
Because you never know what might happen, Stoicism contains an important lesson on not relying on anything that is subject to change. Your bank balance will fluctuate. Friendships come and go. Even the healthiest of relationships can end. Throughout all this change, the only thing with the potential to remain unaffected is ourselves. Every moment of every day, we make a choice as to how we react and respond to things. It is the only real power we have.
“We suffer more in imagination than in reality.”
the Stoics held that we should remember that we all live under the same sky and come from the same place. Everyone deserves respect, regardless of who or what they are.
you are the only thing which you can ever have complete control over.
“You don’t develop courage by being happy in your relationships every day. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.”- Epicurus
“I judge you unfortunate because you have never lived through misfortune. You have passed through life without an opponent— no one can ever know what you are capable of, not even you.”
“No tree becomes rooted and sturdy unless many a wind assails it… the fragile trees are those that have grown in a sunny valley.”
“Could we acquire courage by realising that things which seem terrible to most people are not to be feared but without practicing being fearless towards them?”
Even if you’ve hit rock bottom, life is unlikely to stay there for the rest of your life. Almost everything we experience will pass.
there is more to life than maintaining a front for the benefit of the outside world.
The true misfortune lies in the erroneous belief that superficial things are important. When we fool ourselves into thinking that our money and property are the things that make us happy, we set ourselves up for a lifetime of disappointment because there’s always something better, always someone wealthier.
“We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” – Seneca
The right action involves having the bravery to act in your best interests from a long-term perspective,
Taking Stoic action means you are no longer a passive slave to the world around you. Action is the only possible solution to whatever is troubling you.
“Life is very short and anxious for those who forget the past, neglect the present, and fear the future.” – Seneca
the grand scheme of things, no matter who you are, we’re all very small and trivial.
if nothing lasts forever, what’s really important? This moment right now. The only thing that matters is being the best person you can be at all times.
The world can go crazy around you, but if you have an inward focus and strive to do the right thing, you will navigate the storm.
forget about your thoughts or fear of failure, and see more of what’s going on around you.
The importance of living a good life, striving to always do what is right for the common good, and accepting whatever comes your way because every experience is a lesson.
our lack of personal significance is irrelevant because we are all part of the cosmos, which is in itself inherently beautiful.
When you see yourself as a tiny speck in the eternity of the cosmos, everything is trivial. Nothing is important. Yet at the same time, everything we do matters, because we are all contributing to something far greater than ourselves.
Nothing to be Frightened of by Julian Barnes, When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi, The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion, The Bright Hour: A Memoir of Living and Dying by Nina Riggs, The End of your Life Book Club by Will Schwalbe, or Dying: A Memoir by Cory Taylor.
If you don’t wake up in the morning, would you be happy that this was your last day? What would you do differently if you could go back in time? Would you change how you interacted with people? How will you use this reflection to have a better day tomorrow? Did you meet your goals?
Strive to make good choices about the things that are under your control. Let go of any emotional attachment or response to the things you can’t control.
Essentially, amor fati is the attitude that regardless of what comes your way, every experience is to be welcomed and accepted, regardless of whether it appears to be positive or negative. When it comes to challenges, amor fati goes beyond simple acceptance. You should love whatever difficulties you face because they are what forge you into a better person. So just like fuel for a fire, those tough times are fuel for your personal growth.
the beauty of paying attention to the things that are in your control, e.g. how hard you work, how easily you go with the flow, etc. is that all this effort is likely to mean you do a good job and make it far more likely you gain the support of others.
“In your actions, don’t procrastinate. In your conversations, don’t confuse. In your thoughts, don’t wander. In your soul, don’t be passive or aggressive. In your life, don’t be all about business.” – Marcus Aurelius
“self-deception [is] an awful disease and eyesight a lying sense.”
The first was to be suspicious about your perception and opinion about the people and events you encounter until you’ve tested them;
to take the opposite approach when it comes to evaluating other people’s behaviour, by being sympathetic to their plight rather than automatically suspicious of their motives.
“That’s why the philosophers warn us not to be satisfied with mere learning, but to add practice and then training. For as time passes we forget what we learned and end up doing the opposite, and hold opinions the opposite of what we should.” – Epictetus
“The man who has virtue is in need of nothing whatever for the purpose of living well.”
If you take only one thing away from this book, let it be the knowledge that you cannot control what happens around you, but you have full mastery of your response, and that response should be born out of courage, temperance, justice and wisdom.
“Now is the time to get serious about living your ideals. How long can you afford to put off who you really want to be? Your nobler self cannot wait any longer. Put your principles into practice – now. Stop the excuses and the procrastination. This is your life! … Decide to be extraordinary and do what you need to do – now.”
