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April 19 - May 7, 2024
To a Stoic, time is the most valuable thing you have, if not the only thing, so you need to live in the present with purpose and in harmony with Nature.
you reprioritise your expectations so you’re focusing on being your best self rather than feeding your ego.
The only thing worth chasing is virtue. Wisdom, justice, self-awareness, bravery – these are the goals you should be aiming for.
But as a Stoic, it is your duty to do so, so that we can transform society to a more just and equitable one.
But it’s our time that is the most valuable thing we have.
Your mind needs to be geared towards moderation and self-awareness at all times.
If you worry about winning the approval of others, your focus is in the wrong place.
Conversely, when you worry about what others think, you risk undermining your efforts because you’re so worried about getting it ‘right,’ according to other’s standards, that you can’t do your best because you’re too stressed.
In other words, whatever you are giving attention to is what is going to manifest the most in your life. If you’re stressing about external factors, they’ll continue to rule you and you’ll continue to be miserable and worried. If you’re only concerned about your personal happiness, you’ll miss the opportunity to grow into the valuable member of society you have the potential to be. But if you constantly strive to do your best by considering only those things you have control over, everyone benefits, not just you.
Dilute your vices and virtues for a more balanced life that enables you to appreciate everything for what it is.
Stop aspiring to be anyone but your own best self: for that does fall within your control.” – Epictetus
“First off, don’t let the force of the impression carry you away. Say to it, ‘hold up a bit and let me see who you are and where you are from – let me put you to the test.’”
‘dokimazo.’ This means to test in the sense of someone checking to see whether a gold coin is pure gold or a gem is real.
As a Stoic, Aurelius believed we’re all apprentices of life, constantly learning and never able to say we’ve conquered it because there are always more challenges to come. All we can do is our best, even when it seems that others have got it in for us.
The notion of emotional intelligence arose from the methods of being suspicious of our own assumptions and judgments and having sympathy towards what someone else might be going through and trying to see things from their perspective instead of your own.
‘Human Nature’ as “the condition of a human who is expressing the very best in his or her development, that is their ultimate ‘best self’. They are growing and changing in an effort to reach the ultimate goal for a human being.”
You are, in fact, following the path that is your natural course and when you do what comes naturally, life becomes that much easier, regardless of the obstacles coming in your way.
To a Stoic, no activity is more important than another – they all deserve the same care and attention in order for you to be your best. Being your best self is a habit you can develop through practice and determination and one anyone can acquire.
When you kid yourself about something, like staying in a relationship that is making you miserable or working in a job you hate, you become disconnected from your natural self and lose your way.
Epictetus advised you to “see things for what they really are, thereby sparing yourself the pain of false attachments and avoidable devastation.”
According to the Stoics, there were only four virtues that someone should be ruled by: wisdom, courage, justice and temperance.
The Stoics defined wisdom as the ability to determine what is good, what is evil and what is neither, what things to avoid and what would make no difference to your life of virtue, as well as being able to choose the right course.
Some things matter; a lot of things don’t. A Stoic has the wisdom to determine which is which.
The next Stoic virtue was courage. In Epictetus’ Discourses, he describes life as being “like a military campaign.” By this, he meant we should always be on our guard for symbolic enemies that could disrupt your life.
Justice means always acting in good faith and being steadfast and true.
So, living in accordance with Stoic philosophy means that you should always strive to act with the good of the whole in mind, putting the needs of society before your own.
Moving on to the notion of temperance, to a Stoic, this is all about finding that balance between overindulgence and asceticism, which will lead to a state of contented tranquillity.
Ask yourself at every moment, ‘Is this necessary?’”
If you take only one thing away from this book, let it be the knowledge that you cannot control what happens around you, but you have full mastery of your response, and that response should be born out of courage, temperance, justice and wisdom.