I yell, the sound a pain my soul can’t translate into words that has Paxton staring at me. “Can’t you see that’s what I’ve been doing? What I’ve been trying to do all fucking year? You’re like a brother to me, and so I tried. I tried staying away from her out of respect for you, but I can’t anymore. I just can’t. You can hate me, you can bench me, you can do whatever the hell you need to, but I’ve got to do this for me. For her because I know she needs me just as badly as I fucking need her.”