Many people were dying on the other side of the chasm, but Kaladin didn’t feel a thing for them. No itch to heal them, no desire to help. Kaladin could thank Hav for that, for training him to think in terms of “us” and “them.” In a way, Kaladin had learned what his father had talked about. In the wrong way, but it was something. Protect the “us,” destroy the “them.” A soldier had to think like that. So Kaladin hated the Parshendi. They were the enemy. If he hadn’t learned to divide his mind like that, war would have destroyed him. Perhaps it had done so anyway.
i've thought about this sort of thing a lot. when two things seem irreconciliable, it is ultimately better for a compassionate person's peace of mind to view the other "side" as an enemy. you can't get a desired result without "choosing", and understanding all perspectives means nothing because no matter what, "someone" must lose.
