I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Courage in a Culture of Shame

by Brené Brown

When we tell our stories, we change the world. I know that sounds dramatic, but I believe it. We’ll never know how our stories might change someone’s life—our

For people to look squarely at their harmful actions and to become genuinely accountable they must have a platform of self-worth to stand on. Only from the vantage point of higher ground can people who commit harm gain perspective. Only from there can they apologize.”

it doesn’t have anything to do with what I say or how I treat others. I have to watch what I do and how I treat myself

Twenty-five years ago, top models and beauty queens weighed only eight percent less than the average woman; now they weigh twenty-three percent less. The current media ideal for women is achievable by less than five percent of the female population—and that’s just in terms of weight and size.

She knows what she’s up against—it’s all women versus a huge beauty industry that’s very effective at making us feel bad about ourselves.

We heal through our connections with others.

our concept of perfection is so unrealistic that it can’t exist in one person.

when we blame others we often experience self-righteous anger. Because anger is an emotion of potency and authority, being angry can help us regain a sense of control. Regaining control is important because shame leaves us feeling worthless, paralyzed and ineffective.

We basically dismember women to carve out perfection.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Mavis Leno nailed it. She looked at the audience and simply said, “If you want to make a difference, the next time you see someone being cruel to another human being, take it personally. Take it personally because it is personal!” It was the single most inspiring call to change I’ve heard. We all know how to take it personally. In fact, when we witness cruelty, it’s human nature to take it personally. If we choose not to get involved or pretend it’s not happening, we’re going against the very sense of connection that makes us human.