“Do Ask—Don’t Tell” policy. In all fields where credentials are issued, elusiveness is either formally taught or, at the very least, informally modeled. Most educators and helping professionals—therapists, physicians, social workers, clergy, etc.—have been trained to extract information from reluctant consumers while sharing as little as possible about their lives. The unspoken rule states the greater the credentials and status, the more you’re allowed to know about others and the less you have to reveal about yourself.
