Women with what I would consider the highest levels of shame resilience around the perfection issues had very realistic goals and concrete, measurable strategies for meeting those goals. One example was a woman who struggled with an eating disorder for more than ten years. She said that she overcame her eating disorder and the shame around being bulimic by setting realistic, written “health goals” for every week rather than universal “thinness goals.” She said she no longer wants to be perceived as “thin” but as “healthy,” and she works toward that by exercising for thirty minutes five times a
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