Nightcrawling

by Leila Mottley

And I am still waiting to be hit by some universe-halting love that will turn me inside out and remove all the rotting parts of me. Or at least something to make life bearable that isn’t another person who will leave.

“If you did something wrong, then so did Harriet Tubman and Gloria Steinem and every other woman who did what she had to do even when it wasn’t respected.”

what they say about the heart; when it’s not breaking, you might just get lucky enough to have it feel full, blood pulsing.

Her on top of me. Her pulling back just to stare into me like the stars found their way beneath my eyelids, and I think this might be my universe-halting love, the one that undoes me and keeps me whole all at once.

And even though she’s saying all the right things, it is the look she gives me, the way her eyes pull open so big I know she’s seeing me more than anybody has.