More Than Enough: Claiming Space for Who You Are (No Matter What They Say)

by Elaine Welteroth

We don’t prioritize our time with ourselves. We rarely set aside moments to be still, to access our center. And the bottom line is, when we don’t focus on our inner light, it dims.

And in that knowing, the truth is that nothing bad can ever happen to you. We can see it and process it as bad. Or we can see it and process it as something happening for us, not to us.

Growing up, Oprah was my favorite imaginary auntie. She lived inside the TV and I looked forward to visiting her every day at 4:00 P.M. sharp.

I’ve known for sure every day since is the profound impact of a mother’s love. And for as long as I can remember, it has always been there to remind me that I was born enough.

When your dreams are bigger than the places you find yourself in, sometimes you need to seek out your own reminders that there is more. And there is always more waiting for you on the other side of fear.

treat dating like gardening instead. Plant the most promising seeds. Water them all. Taste what each has to offer. And when you find one that produces fruit you could eat every single day, give a little more love to it and start pruning the rest.

the social circles we belong to, the companies we work for—we give away our power and become dependent upon external validation. When that is taken away, our sense of value, and identity, goes with it. I became determined to win back the warmth of his love because on some level I actually believed I wasn’t enough on my own without him. I wanted the life that looked picture perfect, and I felt like I needed him in it to complete that portrait for me—even if it didn’t always feel good inside. I wanted to find my way back into his light more than I wanted to find the light inside me—the light he had dimmed.

And I cut things off with the man I was dating who wasn’t ready to fully commit—as a practice of walking at the first whisper. It was excruciatingly hard for me to pull that plug, but it was the right decision—and it made room for what was meant to be.

When the music changes, so must your dance.