Fortuna Sworn

by K.J. Sutton

“Satan came to my christening, little boy. Stay out of my way, or I’ll make you piss in your fancy clothes.”

“They will write songs about you, Fortuna Sworn. Oh, how they’ll laugh and sing. You’ll be a legend. The female who married the King of the Unseelie Court and didn’t even know it.”

Both regarded me with mild curiosity. “I’d tell you to take a picture, but then you’d probably just add it to your spank bank collections,” I muttered.

I lost the potential to someday love my mate.

“Why do you have antibiotic cream?” I asked through my teeth. “I didn’t until thirty seconds ago.”

“And how well has that worked for you?” my neighbor called, startling me.

To my surprise, he was gazing back at me. No, not quite at me; his eyes lingered on my body instead. “You’re looking!” I accused. Before the words completely left my mouth, Laurie was already facing the wall again. As he spoke, I could only see the back of his head, but somehow I knew he was smirking. “I did no such thing. You’re hardly my type.”