Nothing he ordered us to do was ever optional, and I wouldn’t have the audacity to refuse his commands for a long time to come. I understood that I did not own the word no. What does no mean? What do we accomplish when we speak it? It is a refusal: I do not accept this dubious gift. Self-protection: You will not violate my sovereignty. Denial: I am not these things that you name me. Children learn the word at a young age, as they test the limits their parents set for them and the boundaries the physical world imposes upon them. As frustrating as it is to accommodate the child’s no, that word
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