In the Shadow of the Valley: A Memoir

by Bobi Conn

What is history anyway? A story: The last man standing holds the pen. A sense of place: I am on this path that is hardly comprehensible. A birthright: I may be from, but I am not of that world.

What is it that convinces so many women—and men as well—to endure destructive relationships for the sake of the children

How could the fear and uncertainty of what might happen to her children compare to what was happening to her children?

some of us never feel like we have a choice, never know we have a voice or a right to speak. Some children are taught they deserve and have such power, but for those of us who weren’t given the privilege of that knowledge, we go on doing the things we saw adults around us do, we subconsciously choose the lives that were modeled for us.

We fight the demons that embedded themselves into the fabric of our consciousness, not knowing why we always feel like we’re in a fight. We walk through the world as if we are part of it, but our anguish constantly reminds us that the world neither loves nor wants things that are broken.

Now I can see that when we are struggling to survive, a lot of things look selfish from the outside—we cling to the things that we believe are keeping us alive, and there is often no logic to that.