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“Because she needs a friend, not a hookup.”
“Hanna, I don’t do love, so we don’t have to worry about either of us falling into that trap. I like you. I like your friendship and talking to you. So, that’s all this is—a friend helping a friend.”
“Touching you is no hardship. I’m offering anything. My body is yours to do any-fucking-thing you want to it,” I said with a bow of my head. “Just ask for what you want. Claim your power to want it.”
“Hanna, I want to do whatever you’re comfortable with. Feel free to use and abuse me.”
Except when Daniel spoke, hate was the furthest thing from my mind. I took the words in and let it spread like fire through my veins.
We were doing this. I was going to travel with Hanna, and the scenarios that flashed through my mind ranged from playing games and laughing to…other things and a lot of moaning. Adrenaline flooded my veins, a heady concoction of excitement tinged in fear of the unknown. But looking down at her wide smile, I didn’t question it.
We kissed and kissed. Not because we were at Voyeur and this was another lesson to help me accept touch. No, this was because I was Hanna, and he was Daniel, and we wanted to.
I was falling for Daniel, and I never wanted to let this go.
No one had grabbed my interest since her, but I figured that was better left unmentioned.
“Nothing without your consent counts. This is your choice. This is the first time you are choosing to give your body to someone, and that is all that matters. Hanna, this is your first time.”
“You’re a fucking queen. Taking my cock however you want.”
A couple of weeks ago, I was desperate to flirt with this man, to find the courage to go on a date with him, but now all I saw when I looked at him was not Daniel.
“The mountains and ocean aren’t that great. Unless there is a sexy man with you. Tell me,”
“It’s okay to like this. It’s yours to feel what you want. And if that feeling is pleasure, then feel it, let it wash over you.”
He claimed me with his cock, and he held me prisoner with his eyes, and I let him.
“No. Love doesn’t fix sickness. It can’t cure cancer, so how do you expect it to heal a mind?”
But Hanna wasn’t just any other woman. She was special. She radiated confidence, strength, and beauty, and women like that didn’t flock to anyone. I needed to shove any insecurities aside and talk to her.
“I know, but I want to. I want to use what happened to me for good. I want to control it. And I’m not only doing it for them. Maybe I need it, too.”
God, I needed him. No, I didn’t need him. If anyone taught me that, it was him. I wanted him. I wanted his arms and his love and his comfort. I wanted to believe him.
“You are all I see. Jesus, you’re all I’ve seen since we met. You steal my attention whenever you walk into a room.”
“I love you, Hanna. I’ve never said that to another woman before.”
I couldn’t wait for our life of him teaching me all the firsts I had to give.
