Within three days he left the monastery in accordance with the words of his elder, who had bidden him “sojourn in the world.”
A letter from Lise should appear here but doesn't in this edition. apparently it reads:
Here is the text of Lise's letter to Alyosha, from Book VII, Chapter 4, "Cana of Galilee" (as found in the classic Constance Garnett translation, which is widely available):
"My dear, kind, good Alexei Fyodorovitch,
I feel that I don't love you at all, and that on the contrary I love Ivan Fyodorovitch. I have the greatest respect for him. I want to leave you, Alexei Fyodorovitch, and to give you back your word, and to ask you to release me from mine. I know I am acting dishonorably. I know it very well, but I don't want to wound you, but to do what's right. Because I really do love Ivan Fyodorovitch. I think he is a wonderful man. And I have the greatest respect for him. I think I am doing what's right. I'm afraid to make you happy, because I don't want to make you unhappy. I am very bad, Alexei Fyodorovitch. I am like a devil. And I love everything bad. I love everything that's bad in myself. It is all the time with me, this love of evil. It is a devil in me, Alexei Fyodorovitch. I am very bad, and I am glad I am so. I am afraid of you, Alexei Fyodorovitch, because you are so good. I am a great sinner. I have lied to you that I love you. I do not love you. I love only Ivan Fyodorovitch. Please forgive me, and let me go. I am so afraid, Alexei Fyodorovitch. I am so very afraid. I am afraid of you, and I am afraid of myself. I'm afraid because I don't want to do what's right. I have a tiny voice in my soul, like a tiny little spider, and it says to me: 'You are bad, very bad, you are vile, vile.' And I feel it is true, that I am vile. I am sending you a kopeck. I don't know why. Forgive me.
Your Lise."
Lise's strange descent into madness makes no sense, but even less without this letter.
