The Bright Side of Going Dark

by Kelly Harms

You give people a distraction from their real lives and a false sense of familiarity that stands between them and having true connection, true community. Your impossible-to-live-up-to images make people think there’s no point in even trying to enjoy the messy real lives they have been given.”

See what life is like when you’re looking at it directly and not through a tiny screen.” She pauses. “Take some time to remember what your dreams really are.”

“Everything you can do on a phone you can do better without a phone. Except the self-numbing and avoidance. Just skip those.”

I watch her work capably by the fire, her eyes glazed over, thinking no doubt of camping trips long past. My mom can do this: she can grieve, she can take as long as she needs. She never feels that push, push, push to move on.

That’s her secret: if you are unwilling to reshape yourself every time the times change, you are, effectively, timeless.

It’s much less crazy making to just be still.”

“It’s a little thread of connection that feels too precious to break. Without it, the loneliness can really get to you.”

“It’s better,” I realize aloud, “if you just run at the truth full speed.” The truth, the sorrow, the grief, the joy.

The first couple of days after he dumped me, I spent a lot of time fantasizing about him coming to his senses and rushing to my side, but now that he’s here, Tucker seems suddenly very tiresome. It’s like I have sudden-onset PMS, if you could focus all that impatient energy at just one person, and that person is wearing stupid hipster glasses he doesn’t need.

Then, thank my lucky stars, you dumped me. Then I felt hurt, then furious, then I forgot you existed for a couple days there, and now we’re hovering around annoyed indifference.”

“Not everything hard is worthwhile,”

There are things you know you want in your life, that you know are good and right and true the moment you realize they exist. Things that you can only miss if you’re not paying attention.