he only knew what I chose to tell him. I hadn’t told anyone the full truth: that despite spending far more days sober than not in the past year, I still found myself drinking quite a lot, and almost always alone; that I hated everything about drinking by then but still didn’t know how to let it go completely; that it made no sense — there was no good reason why or logic to it any longer; that I was terrified, I was angry, and I was so lonely that sometimes my teeth hurt.
.
