Multiple studies found that extreme denial and delusion were maladaptive. But gentle lies, white lies, little rosy rosebuds of lies? Those could be hugely beneficial. The idea was that if you could take a person who was struggling, and help guide her story of herself into a slightly more positive one—one in which she was a bit stronger than she was, kinder than she was, where her breakup was not as much her fault as maybe it was—then you could see profound effects in her life.
Im sort of confused. This breakup was absolutely her fault. No therapist would ever suggest to use framing to make it seem like it was not as much her fault as it was. Maybe they would use it to suggest that the consequences of it arent terrible or that it doesnt mean that the author is necessarily a terrible person. Im having a real hard time caring about the author's struggles with this. I get how it broke her but i really dont feel sorry for her. Also, while i know that outwardly she SAYS that she knows she doesnt deserve sympathy, it feels like this whole section is based around the idea that you feel a little bad for her. Which I dont
