You Are Your Own: A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity

by Jamie Lee Finch

Many Evangelicals who subscribe to this system methodically indoctrinate their children into believing in phenomena like “the rapture”, the value of redemptive violence, the existence of a place of eternal torture after death, an inherited and unavoidable state of sin, the impurity of the female body, and the impossibility of achieving god’s love without surrendering to all the system’s beliefs. Even when those beliefs—if laid out side by side—are often contradictory.

But for me, it was dwelling on the idea that anyone would be going to hell at all that felt so traumatic. It plagued my conscious mind constantly.

quite literally thought and felt that I would never be good, correct, moral, or holy simply because of the existence of my sexuality.

“when you sweep an emotion under the rug, you sweep it into the nervous system”. Bottled emotions are not neutral—they go somewhere.

Unfortunately, even in attempting to stop the cycle by leaving the belief system, many do not find the relief they desperately need because the vast psychological damage does not go away overnight. The fear of hell, especially, can sometimes last an entire lifetime, despite cognitive dismissal, and the long-term damage to self-esteem and self-trust can affect a survivor for years after departure

Be patient, be gentle, be kind, and have hope. Our bodies are on our team.

Once they reconnect to themselves, they will be able to stand firm in the full awareness that all people are safe and loved and accepted just as they are. They can find their purpose in this new and real good news to share: You are your own. Just as you have always been.