Finally, many of us resist opening more to life because we are afraid that if we become too healthy, people will not know how much we have been hurt. If we become healthy, we cannot continue to punish our parents (and other significant figures from our past) for making us suffer. If we are angry at a parent or a spouse, we overeat, or drink too much, or smoke to show them how unhappy we are. If we let these feelings dictate our lives, we have succeeded only in taking over the job of abusing ourselves.
