and there’s a moment right as everything is ready to go but nothing is happening that time pauses entirely. Sebastian has—or had, or will have—a difficult time with time. Sometimes it moves in a different direction or not at all, he was sure of that much, or it could be that his life passing by was the temporal illusion, and these moments were a repeated experience of some platonic truth he could only discover by not seeking it out. It was naked anticipation. He could lay down and live there.
