Do Less: A Revolutionary Approach to Time and Energy Management for Busy Moms

by Kate Northrup

When it comes to your partner or spouse, it’s absolutely miraculous to witness how the more you focus on the qualities they possess that you love, the more those qualities seem to come forward and the less you even notice the things that bug you about them. Sometimes the things that bug you about them actually disappear. Is it because they changed or because your perception changed? I don’t know, but does it really matter? The result is the same.

So true. I hadn’t thought about the why. I just know when I’m frustrated about something that my spouse does, focusing on what I love about him softens me.

Putting our attention on what we want rather than what we don’t want is not only incredibly powerful from a manifesting and law of attraction standpoint, it’s also incredibly powerful when making requests of others in our lives.

I’m reminded of how it feels to be told what I’m doing wrong vs. how to do something better. I get in the receiving mode over defensive mode. That is how everyone is. To get through an issue with someone, start with a suggestion over a command or example of what’s going wrong. I get much further with less emotion with my kids and spouse when I remember to do this. It’s human nature to complain. Being mindful of your approach saves so much time and energy.

Chronos describes linear time that passes by at a set speed in set increments and that we only have so much of. Chiros, on the other hand, describes time that suspends or speeds up depending on what’s happening as that time is passing.

Time flies when we are having fun.

you’re in an energetic dance with someone and you have a certain dynamic, as soon as you change the way you’re behaving, they can no longer do the same dance either. They have to change their dance.

When the same old comes back up, look at how you are handling things in your usual way. To get a different outcome, you must do something different.

What came next was so key. Instead of commiserating with her about how awful it was or leaping in to try and save her and fix the problem, I simply asked her what she thought she was going to do about it.

I need to remember this for a few certain habitual complainers in my extended family.