Teardrop Shot

by Tijan

“What’s your criteria for determining who you choose to be a fuck buddy?”

“You’re a little odd, aren’t you?” I snorted. “Fantastically so.”

“Have you ever been involved in a situation where you felt like the other person needed you so they could live?” I asked. “But you couldn’t stay there because they were taking the oxygen you needed to breathe?”

“Sometimes the hardest part of having a disease, or having something happen to you, is acknowledging that it’s happening. Once you do, your life is never the same. You’re never normal again. Once you acknowledge it and ask for help, you’re never the same person again. You cease to be you, and you become the you with the problem. He’s no longer Damian. He’s Damian who has dementia. Pride can sustain a person for a long time before they have to break.”

I knew in that instant that these were the same feelings I’d had for Damian, all over again. But this was different, because Reese didn’t need me to breathe for him. I just needed to sit alongside him. He could breathe on his own.

For that night, I was his. For that night, he would be mine.

“If we do this, it’s not going to not mean anything,” he whispered.

“We’re so far past the friends-who-bone-who-can’t-bone-anyone-else, aren’t we?”

“I think we have been since we started.” He watched me, steadily. “I think we were before we started.”

“But you’re wrong, Charlie. Walking away from Damian wasn’t the hardest thing. Loving him and staying was the hardest thing you did. You stayed. Remember that.”

“Got it? You’re all about being exposed and shit—well, you’re not alone. I love you, and I have no idea what to do with this. I don’t say pretty words or make fucking declarations. I like you. I love you. I want to always be with you, and that’s that. Right? Isn’t that good enough?”

“You’re annoyed at how much you love me. That’s the most romantic thing anyone’s ever said.”

“You won’t. I can tell you love him too.” Then he was gone, and I wanted to curse at the door. What a fuckhead, who I kinda liked now.

“Life with me is going to be hard. I’m the one with the baggage now. There’s going to be fan pressure, women, publicity. Life’s different at this stage, and I think, I really think, you’re my teardrop shot. You’re the high arch in my life. You’re beautiful inside and out, and you’re rare. So very rare.”