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I check my phone for the fourth time to make sure it’s the right address, as if I have forgotten how to read and might be at the wrong place.
He looks to be in his mid or late thirties with rich brown hair that looks a bit unkempt. The right side is sticking straight up, and the left lies naturally. His facial hair looks scruffy, like it hasn’t been trimmed in a while. His cheeks look hollow like he is beyond exhaustion, but it is clear that this man used to be quite active by the way his T-shirt clings around his muscular arms and stomach.
“Now come on. Stop putting it off and show me what that mouth of yours is really better used for.” He reaches out, moving his hand around until he touches my head and tries to push it down.
I lean forward and kiss his lips gently and though he kisses me back, I can tell he’s hesitant. Each touch, each action is tentative as he tries to navigate a world where I can see everything that he cannot.
“Jesus Christ!” he shouts. “Where?” I ask as I turn the volume down. “Wait a minute…I thought you were blind. How’d you see him?”
“Okay, so you know when you’re walking through the mall and there’s this person that’s just…gorgeous. Like so gorgeous you just stare at them? But you’re like man, I shouldn’t stare so you end up doing like a double take? Yeah, you know what I mean. Like even if they’re of the gender you’re not attracted to, you just appreciate their beauty? I’m the person you run into because you’re so busy staring at them.” “So…you look like a trash can? Is that what I’m hearing?”
He begins to unbutton my shirt with eager fingers.
He’s better looking than any of the guys I’ve seen you with. Let’s see…he has hazel eyes. At first, I thought his eyes were brown, but they have a touch of green to them. He has dark blond hair that’s…got this messy thing going on, like where it looks good even though it looks like he doesn’t do anything with it. Almost…fluffy. Like if I let my hair do that, I’d look like an idiot. He also has this charming smile that I’m pretty sure has gotten him just about everything he’s ever wanted in life.
“Are we here?” he asks. “I swear to god, if we’re at a stop sign again and you tell me we are here like when we went to the pharmacy, I will beat you within an inch of your life.”
“Lane, you’re going to run into something, step to your right,” I say. Lane, trusting me like the good man he is, steps to the right and bumps into the counter. “Fuck,” he growls as I start laughing. “That’s what you get for being mean to me,” I say.
I take a step toward him and lean against him. “You sure can,” I say as my cock seems to realize I’m talking about it.
“Sorry, dogs have to be in a carrier bag,” the attendant says. “Alright. Do you have a Walmart bag? If you have four, I could put a foot in each,” I tell him.
His thumb dips down my nose to my upper lip, then slides over my cheek as I open my eyes. He traces the edge of my lips as I follow each movement with my eyes.
“I’m not scared of being hurt…I’m scared of being alone,” I admit. I feel like I shouldn’t tell him. I feel like I’m giving him a part of myself that I can never get back. And if he doesn’t accept it, I don’t know how I will ever recover. “I’m scared you will leave me.”
Why is it that the first person to ever notice me is a man that can no longer see me?
“Can you tell me what they are?” Lane asks as he hovers over the safe. “There are some little pew pews and a couple of big pew pews,” I say. “You’re useless.”
“I hate this. I hate seeing people that I know,” he grumbles once we are out of earshot. “Well, it’s a good thing you’re blind then,” I say.
Lane reaches out to me, but instead of pulling me toward him, he pushes me against the sink as he moves up against me, so I’m pinned between him and the sink. “I might as well get some fun out of going to a brothel,” Lane says as he unbuttons my pants. My heart seems to quicken in anticipation as I watch him eagerly. His arms snake around my waist as he pulls me up against him and gently kisses my lips. I open my mouth just enough to feel his tongue as I feel his cock pressed against me. His hand slides down so he can unbutton my pants before pushing them down my hips.