The Roughest Draft

by Emily Wibberley

Reading and loving books are the fingerprints of who I am—no matter how much I change, they’ll stay the same,

Today isn’t your entire life. Today is one day of your job. Do your job the best you can, then do the next thing. Okay?

“The more I talked to you, I felt something I never had. It was like you could articulate every thought of mine I didn’t know how to. Like you were bringing my own self into sharper focus.”

I’m scared of being nothing. Not becoming nothing, in the sense of dying. I mean the life-in-death of being no one special. Being nobody’s person. Being worth nothing.

Miami seemed a likeable, lively composite of other places I know—the clean commercialism of San Diego combined with the old-school relaxation of Italy and the vibrance of Havana.

I learned sometimes relationships don’t die. They just don’t grow. Kept from sunlight, from nourishment, they never flourish. Nothing is different today from how Chris’s and my relationship has been for years. He was an easy presence in my life, someone who gave me the appearance of contentment. A walking résumé for a husband. He was successful, handsome, and smart. He was involved in my career—which wasn’t hard since he was my agent. Above all, I knew he would never leave me. I didn’t know then what I do now. Never leaving someone isn’t the same as loving them.

Because I’ve realized a life lived with you is the best story I could ever tell.