Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex

by Angela Chen

Incels, on the other hand, are desperately interested in sex. Incels have also absorbed the lesson that real men have sex with women, but they lack the sexual expertise needed to participate in the rites of masculinity. For this I have sympathy. Exclusion and social rejection are painful, and in fact, the first incel website was started by a woman who wanted to create a supportive community for the lonely.20 Incels, however, are not merely lonely. They are also entitled, and here my sympathy ends. Instead of questioning the narrative of masculinity that prioritizes sexual conquest, incels lean into it, misusing evolutionary psychology to make themselves more miserable and falling into reductionist theories about genetic fitness and how the purpose of men is to impregnate as many women as possible.